No idea, What do you write on something that might not get read? Ha. I'm gonna explain recent happenings with a certain person. I need to get it all down becasue it's generally hard to explain. Becasue it really sums me up this I think, becasue he was a bit part of my life for a fucking long time.
2 years.
That is how long I worried and cared about him. 2 fucking years of my life that I won't get back. The amount of good times with him though and the amount of bad are uncomparable and unforgettable. I can still remember, this one night I ran out of a friend's house becasue of how he looked at me and a comment he had passed. That's how serious it was I guess. was raining aswell, Would be wouldnt it, the stereotypical scene, 2 young people stood on a road in the rain. So bloody ironic. I remember exactly the way he looked at me in the street light and what he said and that is generally something that will stay with me forever. Just goes to show how much of an idiot I am, all this time people telling me to leave him and get on with my life when I couldnt bring myself to. I know why I was attatched now though but it has taken far too long to work out. The amount of people who have come and gone in the time and all the time if I ran away I could always go back to him. But all it took was somebody to make one comment and it sent me into some mad thing and put an end to it for good. Of course I still care about him an a really stupid way but not so much that I need him anymore. I just got sick of hurting becasue of him, it got tiring and it grinds you down and makes you feel like shit and that is something that nobody needs. It wasnt always his fault, it was just shit that got in the way, shit that usualy came when he was around. I want to know him, and I want him in my life with no strings. I want to be his friend. But that wont happen. And yes, I'm going back on everything I ever said to him and I;m breaking all the promises and taking back all the words. If that makes me a bad person, screw it. I'm walking away.
2 years.
That is how long I worried and cared about him. 2 fucking years of my life that I won't get back. The amount of good times with him though and the amount of bad are uncomparable and unforgettable. I can still remember, this one night I ran out of a friend's house becasue of how he looked at me and a comment he had passed. That's how serious it was I guess. was raining aswell, Would be wouldnt it, the stereotypical scene, 2 young people stood on a road in the rain. So bloody ironic. I remember exactly the way he looked at me in the street light and what he said and that is generally something that will stay with me forever. Just goes to show how much of an idiot I am, all this time people telling me to leave him and get on with my life when I couldnt bring myself to. I know why I was attatched now though but it has taken far too long to work out. The amount of people who have come and gone in the time and all the time if I ran away I could always go back to him. But all it took was somebody to make one comment and it sent me into some mad thing and put an end to it for good. Of course I still care about him an a really stupid way but not so much that I need him anymore. I just got sick of hurting becasue of him, it got tiring and it grinds you down and makes you feel like shit and that is something that nobody needs. It wasnt always his fault, it was just shit that got in the way, shit that usualy came when he was around. I want to know him, and I want him in my life with no strings. I want to be his friend. But that wont happen. And yes, I'm going back on everything I ever said to him and I;m breaking all the promises and taking back all the words. If that makes me a bad person, screw it. I'm walking away.
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